falling back down... cant be
Wednesday, December 06, 2006 0 comments

sian arhhhh... ... ... ... ... ... ... hols lidat gone so fast, if i carry on lidat, might as well ready to prepare for sch early, cuz hols will end soon. wtf lar... so many things to concern... head if nt burst then is explode, or implode. haiz
today kena scolded by mr lee... haiz wtf; nth to say, cuz is nt his fault, is mine... so sad man, and helpless, hope it's not hopeless yet... afta join vacational bible sch at HOGc, then v busy, still nid do dis do tt... sekali i become plan maniac. esp fone calls to make... hate tt fucking part man, fone bill 'boom' liao lar, plus too lazy to msg... so sucky, wa lau hand and fingers tired liao lar msg msg msg... wish i could jus scream my lungs out. then some more afta msg then if gt amendments mus call again... wtffff man...
about church. still couldnt feel wat is known as 'presence of God'. should i b christian mah? my parents object leh, i myself haf doubts bout God, but i wana feel God, wana feel sth diff, wana haf my life changed and break free from being a fucking shy introvert. hate being tt... always go somewhere then diam diam... dare nt speak out... haiz.... then recently i oso signed up for courses in church... too bad lar my fault oso, should i haf known bout my position and schedule tt i may reconsider... too late.. no pt in it. getting impatient in feeling for God... wat to do? duno lor, try to reach out for frens but sometimes jus v hard to do so... mebbe i should jus try QT and read bible... haiz back to square one.
aiya since so many things most probs come from these lo... since seldom go out wif frens sure haf no probs wif them de, cuz wan to quarrel oso canot meet face to face, oso canot quarrel on fone mah, fone bill burst. worse still, NO WAY MSG-ing man, hate it. jus makes me crush my fone. wish it's nt too late for God or some other mystical person to save me... ~waiting on euu~



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!Gerard!
!15 yrs!
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